President Obama announced today that beginning May 1, federal highway funds for states will require a minimum of 7% of every public dollar be set aside to fund bike lanes. The stock price of Huffy Bikes soared to a new all-time record on the President’s announcement.
It is estimated that Kentucky’s new bicycling program will receive almost $400 million in federal tax dollars. The state highway department estimates that this money will fund almost 7,000 miles of bike lanes in Kentucky, most of which will be located in Senator Mitch McConnell’s home district.
If all goes as planned, US EPA estimates that greenhouse emissions will be cut by 22% from the reduced number motor vehicles on streets because of workers riding to work on their bikes rather than driving. EPA is hoping that regulation of greenhouse gas can be substantially scaled back due to the reduction in carbon emissions from cars and motorcycles left at home.
The American Medical Society welcomed the news and said that the additional exercise will cut medical costs an estimated $15-20 Billion per year over the next 10 years. The reduction in health care costs is based on the estimated amount of exercise needed to commute to work. The president of the AMA said, “no longer will Americans be fat and lazy because of a lack of exercise.”
AMA also wants the President to require bike helmets to prevent brain injuries from all this additional bike riding. Doctors are concerned that too many potential riders are too inexperienced to ride a bike without a helmet.
In support of exercise, President Obama said that he hopes to offer bikers a real incentive to bike to work. The President wants to give a $1,000 tax credit for every American worker who will bike to work a minimum of 20 times each year. Congress is expected to set the proposal in writing in the next 30 days.
All of this seems to be a win-win situation for America. However, Kentucky’s senior Senator, Mitch McConnell, said today that he opposes any idea that President Obama supports. “It is a matter of the senator’s principle to oppose everything that Obama wants,” according to an unnamed McConnell spokesperson.
Still the bacon is coming to Louisville in the form of "millions of dollars for bike lanes and trails,” according to Senator McConnell. Unfortunately, the senior senator does not own a bike, and is reportedly unable to ride one because of being totally uncoordinated.
Texas oil man, T. Boone Pickens, believes this measure will help reduce America’s funding of Middle Eastern counties by reducing the amount of foreign oil imported into this country. “Damn, I love this measure,” said Pickens. “It will help reduce our soaring national debt over time and reduce greenhouse gas emissions from cars. I am favor of Obama’s action,” he added. Pickens believes that Americans want bike lanes as an alternative means of getting to work and school. Pickens said that he is going to ride his bike to work as often as possible.
According to the new executive order, states are strongly encouraged to establish bike lanes along major traffic routes and in congested urban areas. The federal money can also be used to fund bike trails and parks for little kids to learn to ride two wheelers.
Many cities are announcing major decisions on new bike lanes. Locally, the mayors of Cincinnati, Covington, Florence, and Newport announced a new comprehensive system of interconnected bike lanes that they hope will bring more people back to the urban areas. The focal point of the plan is Covington’s Devou Park with its panoramic views of the Ohio River and downtown Cincinnati.
The Greater Cincinnati Airport announced that it would open its newest and longest runway to bike riders on the weekend. “We simply don’t use the main runways on the weekends since Delta Airlines left. The runways’ two miles of smooth level concrete will offer riders a place to race in a long straight line,” according to a press release from CVG’s airport board.
According to the NKY Chamber of Commerce, the group supports any activity that brings local residents back to the airport. There are rumors that the airport will host a bike race in May to compete with the Kentucky Derby.
Newport’s Hofbrauaus announced that it give a substantial discount to bicycle riders who visit the beer tent from 4 to 6 pm during happy hour. Waiters and waitresses will immediately dress in spandex biker’s shorts and tops to promote bicycling.
Several other beer joints along Route 8 in Northern Kentucky plan to give away beer to attract bikers. Many other area establishments are also making discounted beverages and meals available to bike riders in and around Cincinnati. Covington's chief of police said that his department would not tolerate drunken bikers in Covington. However, the chief seemed to change his mind when informed that the riders would be on bicycles and not motorcycles. He refused further comment and referred all questions to city attorney Frank Warnock.
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